Submitted by Alex This is the Holy Christmas Trinity. According to tradition, the baby Jesus cannot be placed in the manger scene until Christmas Eve. "Don't turn away from the missing Baby Jesus, Frosty! Look at him, darn it!!" Violations: Intermingling
8 comments:
Anonymous
said...
your not supposed to put baby Jesus out until Christmas Eve at Midnight any Christian would know that
To each his own. That's what makes America such an interesting place to live. I love it. There are people to laugh about everywhere...the Griswald's of the block (and there is one on every block thank God), the snooty uptight people that take life so damned seriously, the snooty uptight people who think "there should be laws against to many xmas lights", etc, etc, etc. If you can't have fun in your lifetime, what the heck is the point? You should move to some other super strict country and let Americans have thier freedom! Our sons and daughters and brothers and sisters and fathers and mothers are dieing over seas so we can have the freedom to do whatever we damned well please! Also, don't complain because you have to close the shades to get dressed because of the traffic. YOUR NEIGHBORS DON'T WANT TO SEE YOU NAKED EITHER...EWWWW! Your shades should be closed anyways if you are removing your clothes!!!
Oh thanks for posting the pictures. I don't agree with your point of view and can't stand people like you, but you have freedom like everyone else. I love looking at everyone's creativity. Some are beautiful, some are funny, some are laughable, all are wonderful!
Have fun, be jolly, laugh alot, and have a Merry Christmas and Happy friggin New Year!!! LOL Ahhh Life if good.
Frosty came to the desert to look upon the Child of God. A smile crossed his face as he looked toward the heavens. Then the sun came up and he melted, but the rabbit stole the top hat from the magician and Frosty was reborn!
And we all held hands and danced and sang and were glad our sons and daughters were over there fighting for our right to mix yard ornaments.
Uh, yard decorating holiday lover? I highly doubt people join the military in order to defend your right to have Christmas decorations in your front yard.
Yeah, and I can't stand people like you either. Seriously, get a sense of humor.
And no, you don't have the freedom to do whatever you please. We have these things call "laws" you have to follow.
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Violations Cited
Unharmonious Arrangement Violation: Yard decorations should be placed in aesthetically pleasing arrangements. Please refer to other rules for tips. Lining up the figures in rows or alphabetically is still not pleasing, organized yes, pleasing, no.
Griswold Family Violation: If your neighbors have nicknamed you the Griswold family and you are aware of this (you have rude neighbors, your nickname should never be divulged), you probably shouldn’t tell people.
Monochromatic Violation: If your decorating theme involves the over-use of one color, you are in violation.
W.T.H. (What the Heck!?) Violation: Random, non-holiday decor has no place in December. Just because you were given a cool giant light up smiley face does not mean you should put it on the roof this month!
King Kong Complex Violation: If a giant polar bear is standing anywhere near a mid-sized Santa or the Abominable Snowman is lurking over the manger, do something, quick!
Seizur-ific Violation: Sometimes using foil is just a little too much when combined with all of those bright lights. Also, too much blinking or out of sync movement can put you in jeopardy of losing your Christmas light license.
Frequent Lighter Card: If you have the electric company or an electrician on speed dial, you need a new hobby.
P.O.W. (Prisoners of a Wall) Violation: Trapping your Christmas village behind a fence is way too constricting for the purpose that these figures must serve during this time of year. Free the inflatables!
More is Not Less Violation: Just another reminder that Christmas is a season of minimalism. Too much of anything is not a good thing. Remember that other cliché; less is more? It really is. Less of an energy bill is more money in your pocket to give to others or to buy something nice to not put on your lawn.
Fallen Figurines/Drive-by Shooting Victims Violation: These poor souls should not be illuminated. If you aren’t going to go outside to set them all back up, don’t plug them in. No one wants to see Mary and Joseph laying down as if involved in a deadly drive-by shooting.
Multiple Clauses Violation: There is one Santa Claus and only one. I repeat- you may not have more than ONE Santa in your yard at anytime. (The exception is this; if you have a Santa from another culture or a Santa of another ethnicity, THEN you may have another Santa among the deciduous forest that is your yard. This does not mean you may have an inflatable Santa AND a plastic, light-up Santa. Inflatable is not an ethnicity). The same rules apply for Mrs. Claus. Santa is not an adulterer. We must show Santa as an upstanding and moral citizen, despite the 3rd world wages he pays the elves.
Elves: While we are on the subject. This is one group of people that even we don’t mess with. Everyone knows that Santa hardly does any work at the North Pole. His input on who’s naughty or nice is non-existent. He’s too busy making mall appearances and such. The elves are the ones that MapQuest directions for Santa, they check the list, they pack the presents, THEY are in charge. Go buck wild with the elves…if you must.
Intermingling Violation: This is strictly prohibited. There should not be a North Pole sign lit up outside of the manger scene. A giant inflatable Santa should not be peering into the manger. Jesus was born in a manger, a place of nothingness, a symbol of scarcity and minimalism. Santa and friends next to the manger is mockery of the Lord! They are taunting the KING!
Snowman In-Laws Violation: I hate to say it but we MUST have limitations on how many snowmen may appear on the lawn of the average single family dweling. The average family size in the United States is 3.14 with the average household size being 2.59 (US Census Bureau). That being said, we will be generous and say that there cannot be a family of snowmen that exceeds 4 on your lawn. Four is plenty. Again, real snowmen, inflatable snowmen, plastic snowmen, etc are not classified differently, they are still snowmen.
8 comments:
your not supposed to put baby Jesus out until Christmas Eve at Midnight any Christian would know that
Yes the main point is Jesus was not found till he was 3 years old by the wise men. Not a Baby as all think.
I bet baby Jesus would have loved looking at a big snowman. I like the decorations. Most AWESOME!!!
who cares about making everyting exactly right?
this is christmas it's supposed 2 be fun
To each his own. That's what makes America such an interesting place to live. I love it. There are people to laugh about everywhere...the Griswald's of the block (and there is one on every block thank God), the snooty uptight people that take life so damned seriously, the snooty uptight people who think "there should be laws against to many xmas lights", etc, etc, etc. If you can't have fun in your lifetime, what the heck is the point? You should move to some other super strict country and let Americans have thier freedom! Our sons and daughters and brothers and sisters and fathers and mothers are dieing over seas so we can have the freedom to do whatever we damned well please! Also, don't complain because you have to close the shades to get dressed because of the traffic. YOUR NEIGHBORS DON'T WANT TO SEE YOU NAKED EITHER...EWWWW! Your shades should be closed anyways if you are removing your clothes!!!
Oh thanks for posting the pictures. I don't agree with your point of view and can't stand people like you, but you have freedom like everyone else. I love looking at everyone's creativity. Some are beautiful, some are funny, some are laughable, all are wonderful!
Have fun, be jolly, laugh alot, and have a Merry Christmas and Happy friggin New Year!!! LOL Ahhh Life if good.
anonymous: YOu are moron. She said that Jesus couldn't be placed there until Christmas Eve. Loser. Learn to read!
Frosty came to the desert to look upon the Child of God. A smile crossed his face as he looked toward the heavens. Then the sun came up and he melted, but the rabbit stole the top hat from the magician and Frosty was reborn!
And we all held hands and danced and sang and were glad our sons and daughters were over there fighting for our right to mix yard ornaments.
Uh, yard decorating holiday lover? I highly doubt people join the military in order to defend your right to have Christmas decorations in your front yard.
Yeah, and I can't stand people like you either. Seriously, get a sense of humor.
And no, you don't have the freedom to do whatever you please. We have these things call "laws" you have to follow.
Seriously, where do these people come from?
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