TackyChristmasYards: Tacky for Charity might cancel out the tackiness. Probably not!

Friday, December 21, 2007

Tacky for Charity might cancel out the tackiness. Probably not!

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Submitted by Alek, Alaska

Alek has decorated his home and is raising money for charity. However, he is taunting me! I must "award" him some violations despite being for a good cause!

Violations: Frequent Lighter Card, King Kong Complex, Multiple Clauses, W.T.H.?!? Homer and the Hulk speak nothing to my Christmas spirit. Elmo has a leg to stand on because he was the HOTTEST toy for several years.

11 comments:

Anonymous said...: Why is Homer in a skeleton costume?; December 21, 2007 at 10:55 PM
Anonymous said...: I think it is very impressive. I am not sure where people even find these things!; December 22, 2007 at 2:58 PM
Anonymous said...: This is just horrible that you just can't let the kids enjoy the lights. Have a Very Merry Christmas!!!; December 22, 2007 at 3:06 PM
Anonymous said...: I think that the kids may enjoy having a bit more energy and a bit less pollution in their lives when they grow up. That way they can enjoy light, air, and water when they are adults.
Christmas is the most wasteful time of the year.; December 22, 2007 at 3:23 PM
Anonymous said...: I love that people are complaining about a site because it's complaining about decorations. Oh, the irony...

Anyone can make a site about anything. That's the way it goes, my friends.

Here is my opinion: your Christmas decorations are ugly and wasteful. See, we can all have our own opinions!; December 22, 2007 at 3:43 PM
Anonymous said...: well I think that the Incredible Hulk (on the balcony) is the epitomy of Christmas. He is big and green, and only comes once a year... or wait... I think I just described my ex-wife.; December 22, 2007 at 3:44 PM
Anonymous said...: I'm the person with the Hulk'in Homer Simpson Display that Kat has featured here - see the 17,000 lights and actually control 'em (yes, turn them on and off) at the Christmas Lights Webcam.

I personally find Kat's "TackyChristmasYards website hilarious. Is my site a bit over-the-top ... YES. Does it deserve the "violations" from Kat ... HECK YES!

Best Wishes and Merry Christmas,
alek (Clark Grizwold wanna-be)

P.S. While the display is totally free (and totally fun) to control, it also raises awareness and funds for Celiac Disease Research - over $20,000 so far.; December 22, 2007 at 4:12 PM
Anonymous said...: That's sorta mean that she's ragging on people's houses like that just because they are trying to spread Christmas spirit. I personally think that these yards are beautiful and there isn't anything she can post on the web that will ever change that. So I hope she changes her mind but... who knows... I guess some people are better off being Scrooges. I'm glad that I'm not.; December 22, 2007 at 4:46 PM
Anonymous said...: Anonymous: "just let the kids enjoy the lights"

Get a life! Learn to read! Kids shouldn't be on this site anyway. They hardly want to see lights, they would rather play video games. Get over it and come up with something original that has something to do with where you are posting it.; December 23, 2007 at 9:55 PM
Anonymous said...: I once lived next to a man who kept out his decorations for the whole year and just built his Christmas decorations up around them. Maybe Homer is left over from Halloween.; December 25, 2007 at 9:26 AM
Anonymous said...: Hod do you get in the garage?; December 28, 2007 at 11:49 AM

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Violations Cited

Unharmonious Arrangement Violation: Yard decorations should be placed in aesthetically pleasing arrangements. Please refer to other rules for tips. Lining up the figures in rows or alphabetically is still not pleasing, organized yes, pleasing, no.
Griswold Family Violation: If your neighbors have nicknamed you the Griswold family and you are aware of this (you have rude neighbors, your nickname should never be divulged), you probably shouldn’t tell people.
Monochromatic Violation: If your decorating theme involves the over-use of one color, you are in violation.
W.T.H. (What the Heck!?) Violation: Random, non-holiday decor has no place in December. Just because you were given a cool giant light up smiley face does not mean you should put it on the roof this month!
King Kong Complex Violation: If a giant polar bear is standing anywhere near a mid-sized Santa or the Abominable Snowman is lurking over the manger, do something, quick!
Seizur-ific Violation: Sometimes using foil is just a little too much when combined with all of those bright lights. Also, too much blinking or out of sync movement can put you in jeopardy of losing your Christmas light license.
Frequent Lighter Card: If you have the electric company or an electrician on speed dial, you need a new hobby.
P.O.W. (Prisoners of a Wall) Violation: Trapping your Christmas village behind a fence is way too constricting for the purpose that these figures must serve during this time of year. Free the inflatables!
More is Not Less Violation: Just another reminder that Christmas is a season of minimalism. Too much of anything is not a good thing. Remember that other cliché; less is more? It really is. Less of an energy bill is more money in your pocket to give to others or to buy something nice to not put on your lawn.
Fallen Figurines/Drive-by Shooting Victims Violation: These poor souls should not be illuminated. If you aren’t going to go outside to set them all back up, don’t plug them in. No one wants to see Mary and Joseph laying down as if involved in a deadly drive-by shooting.
Multiple Clauses Violation: There is one Santa Claus and only one. I repeat- you may not have more than ONE Santa in your yard at anytime. (The exception is this; if you have a Santa from another culture or a Santa of another ethnicity, THEN you may have another Santa among the deciduous forest that is your yard. This does not mean you may have an inflatable Santa AND a plastic, light-up Santa. Inflatable is not an ethnicity). The same rules apply for Mrs. Claus. Santa is not an adulterer. We must show Santa as an upstanding and moral citizen, despite the 3rd world wages he pays the elves.
Elves: While we are on the subject. This is one group of people that even we don’t mess with. Everyone knows that Santa hardly does any work at the North Pole. His input on who’s naughty or nice is non-existent. He’s too busy making mall appearances and such. The elves are the ones that MapQuest directions for Santa, they check the list, they pack the presents, THEY are in charge. Go buck wild with the elves…if you must.
Intermingling Violation: This is strictly prohibited. There should not be a North Pole sign lit up outside of the manger scene. A giant inflatable Santa should not be peering into the manger. Jesus was born in a manger, a place of nothingness, a symbol of scarcity and minimalism. Santa and friends next to the manger is mockery of the Lord! They are taunting the KING!
Snowman In-Laws Violation: I hate to say it but we MUST have limitations on how many snowmen may appear on the lawn of the average single family dweling. The average family size in the United States is 3.14 with the average household size being 2.59 (US Census Bureau). That being said, we will be generous and say that there cannot be a family of snowmen that exceeds 4 on your lawn. Four is plenty. Again, real snowmen, inflatable snowmen, plastic snowmen, etc are not classified differently, they are still snowmen.

TackyChristmasYards

Friday, December 21, 2007

Tacky for Charity might cancel out the tackiness. Probably not!

11 comments:

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Violations Cited